I was browsing the internet again, looking for pictures of skinny people. I know that's all i ever do. Just add photos and photos of people and never really write anything. That's because i don't want to give myself the chance to start writing about what i do and don't think about my weight. I'm quite happy just not getting too worried about it and letting it just brew, sort of. I have too much else to worry about, like exams, and keeping Josh happy. But i like looking at these photos anyway.

I'm gutted that my vege diet hasn't seen me lose any kgs, only put them on. Thought it would help. I bought teh 'Skinny Bitch' book off of the internet... have read some of it, but not sure if i'm ready to go vegan yet. That's too much work for the sake of loosing a few extra kilos, those i can starve off anyway.

Can't find an adequate website to copy pictures from so i will leave it there for today. Much love xoxox

I was just browsing teh internet and i found some photos of Ange on a few of her UN ambassador trips. She's so beautiful and i just had to add her...













She's just so pretty, and so lucky to have a family like she does...

I just had to add some more. Really feeling the need for some motivation at the moment....




This girl is sooo beautiful. She's almost perfect.







She almost reminds me of Rebecca Dodds. But she's so pretty too. Its a shame she doesn't have longer hair.

I just thought i would post some more thinspo. It really helps me to get along i think. Well for a little while anyway. I always think to myself when i am looking at these beautiful women 'i can really do it this time, no more gorging myself on fast food and cakes and sweets and most of all chocolate'. I mean, take Angie for example. She looks so beautiful, and slender. I love her legs, and most of all her arms. I love it every day when i look in teh mirror and i see my skinny arms (they get better every day at the moment i think). But then i see my legs and bum and think to myself, if they could just be like Angie's then i would be ok.

It all comes down to living in a Hall of Residence though. It's so difficult for me to eat properly without the facilities. I would eat things like celery and lettuce, if i knew that it wouldn't get stolen when i put it in teh fridge. I'm looking forward to next year and flatting (hopefully with Josh). I would really love to buy that house with him, but i think he is right, we're not really prepared to buy a house at the moment, but maybe we could look at it for the following year if we are still together and all that jazz.

But i've posted a lot of Ange Thinspo. I think she is beautiful. I would have gotten more, but Firefox began to play up so i'll have to do some updating later.

Overall, today was a pretty bad day food-wise. I started out ok with a bowl of cereal, but i asked Josh to make it for me and he filled it up to teh brim. But i love Cheerio's so much that i ate the whole thing, and it had apricot yoghurt on  it also. Then i didn;t eat anything until about 3 o'clock when i went nato and had a sausage roll, an apricot and yoghurt muffin, and a cornetto. I no longer feel hungry though, just bloated, so that will stop me from eating anything for the rest of tonight at least, but who knows what tomorrow will bring. I won't have anything until after lectures and stuff tomorrow, and i think i'll save the Up'n'Go for that. That way its onlu 300 or so calories, and we'll see how we go after that.

I wanted to go out for Mexican as well, but Josh was like, leave it till teh weekend. That's all very well but i can't just keep occassionally bingeing. I need to keep a constant state of eating less and less if i want to look like Ange. And i don't see how Josh can love me when i;m all jubbly everywhere. But somehow he does. At the moment i want to focus on my thighs, calves and butt. I seem to be able to get my stomach flat with a bout of fasting, so i know i can fix that easily, but its just the hips, thighs and butt that are really getting me down at teh moment. I went to the gym this arvo as well, but everytime i go i do less and less. Did some serious amount of weightlifting while i was there today, and 10 mins on teh cross-trainer doing a glute workout. That was hard work, but we also walk/ran there and back, so hopefully some more calories burnt there.

I suppose the good thing is that i dont have to have Cheerio's for breakfast tomorrow because they're at Josh's!

Current Weight:         47.5 kgs    104.5 lbs
Current Goal Weight:   45 kgs     90 lbs

Morning

I have decided to start my 10 day fast today. Stats for this morning are as follows:
   Weight (kgs):   48.3
    Weight (lbs):   106.2
My favourite website the moment is ANAbones. The girl there is really inspirational and she puts a lot of stuff on the site which is really useful, for example, this weight chart...

Height    Healthy     15%        25%        35%       

5'3''        115                97            86            74
5'4''        120                102          90            78
5'5''        125               106           93            81
5'6''        130                110           97           84
5'7''        135               114           101          87
5'8''        140               119           105          91       
5'9''        145               123           108           94
5'10''        150             127           112           97
5'11''        155             131            116        100

I thought it was really handy. Just for the records, i am about 167cm, so i am aiming to be about 25% under (which is 101 lbs). But my ideal weight goal is 45 kgs at teh moment. The 10 day fast (providing i can get past day three) should take me down to that in a matter of days, seeing as how i lost a kg in one day the other day when i ate nothing all day. But we will see. I should be starting work (at Briscoes Papanui) this weekend hopefully as well, so we'll just have to see how things go. I'll update later on today to compare weights.

Here's some more stuff from ANAbones.. stuff regarding fasting and shit. And some Thinspo xoxo

Fasting

INFO ON A 10 DAY WATER FAST: How much weight will I lose? Weight loss can initially be as high as three to four pounds per day, much of it water, but as the fast continues, the average loss will be one pound per day. If you are juice fasting and not losing weight, the juice is supplying all the calories you need. You may have to cut down on the juices or alternate between water fasting and juice fasting if losing weight is part of your goal. The slower your metabolism, the slower the weight loss. Will I get too thin? If you are thin or at average weight and you fast for 30 days on juice or 10 days on water, ribs will show, face will become gaunt, friends and family will notice. It is imperative not to eat a lot after the fast because the body will quickly re-gain the lost weight during the next 10 days. Instead, ease yourself onto food by gradually incorporating fruit and veg in your diet. Metabolism is normalized due to the cleansing process. It is very important not to try to gain weight too quickly. The body can rebuild only at a set rate. Overeating will burden the body and undermine the rebuilding process. Will fasting shrink my stomach? From years of over-filling the stomach, it is no surprise that the muscles supporting the tummy have lost its natural elasticity, stretched out of shape. People with large protruding stomachs need more food to feel full, out-eating their need. Fasting helps recover the stomach's natural elasticity, restoring a flat stomach. You will be satisfied on less food, tummy in proportionate size to the body’s caloric requirement.

Absence of Food and State Fasting refers to the complete absence of Food, only Water. Short-Term Fasting In general, fasts should be conducted for no longer than 28 days, with most fasts 21 days or less. Long fats (for more than 42 days), are both unnecessary, and potentially dangeroud. A prolonged fast, for more than 2-3 months, is called Starvation! Although most of the 'miraculous' benefits of fasting do result from 3-5 days or more but 7-14 days, that's "healing". Although days 1-7 are quite benefitial to be sure, days 7-14 are truly tremendous, with the benefits from days 14-21 becoming extreme. Days 21-28 are nothing than a complete regeneration of the body. Literally erasing years of aging. (Where the true "Miracles of fasting" take place). Medium-Term Fasting Medium fasts (Between 28-42 days), although certainly possible, and frequently performed by dedicated fasters. The benefits of a 35 day fast are absolutely astonishing! Fasting and Ketone Bodies After the third day of a fast, the body begins to make ketone bodies in the liver (Enters ketosis). In the absence of food (Energy), Ketone bodies are produced by the body as an alternate energy source. Normally, ketone levels in the blood are less than 0.2mm. After several days of fasting they approach 3.0mm, and steadily rise thereafter. Importantly, never eat, even an extremely amount of food during a fast. This will quickly shift the body out of ketosis, back to its normal metabolism of glucose (food), decreasing ketone bodies, decreasing growth hormone and increasing hunger. Fasting and Hunger Levels The only challenge to fasting, and a challenge for many it is, is completing the first 1-5 days. During days 1-5 hunger levels can flucuate from average, to well above average many actually experience their greatest hunger on day 3 (Just prior to ketosis, when both blood sugar, and ketone body levels, are lowest). After day 3, hunger levels noticeably decrease. After day 5, hunger levels, and the "desire" for food in general (So strong initially), dramatically decrease. After day 10, hunger levels, for the most part, are non-existent. Fasting and Energy Levels During days 1-5, energy levels can flucuate from average to well below average (Feeling light headed, at times, is not uncommon). During days 5-10, energy levels very noticeably improve after day 10, with sharply elevated levels of both growth hormone, and ketone bodies, energy levels are tremendous, as is mental clarity. Fasting and Weight Loss Expect (in general) to lose 1 pound each day of fasting! Fasting and Starvation Contrary to what many people believe, fasting is not starvation. During the fast, the body is breaking down the non-essential tissue (Fat) for energy. While conserving essential tissue. Starvation, is the point where the body has used up all of its non-essential tissues (Reserves) ,and begins to break down its own essential tissues. This point (The point of starvation), even for the average individual (Of normal weight), takes quite some time to reach (Some 42 days or more). Fasting and severely restrictive diets Prolonged, severely restrictive diets are extremely unhealthy, in many cases, even life threatening. Unlike fasting, the body never completely enters ketosis (A fundamental process in sparing essential tissue from breaking down). The result, severely restrictive diets cause the body to lose a much greater percentage of lean body tissue (Essential tissue) than a complete fast. Over time (Once body reserves become dangerously low), lean body tissue (Essential tissue) eventually become used as an energy source. Prolonged, severely restrictive diets, are essentially just a slow form of starvation. Fasting and Calorie Restriction Calorie restricted (10-30%) diets are extremely healthy. Unlike severly restricted diets, the bodies energy (Food) needs are restricted just enough to result in sharply elevated levels of growth hormone, while eliminating the need to break down essential tissues. Recommended Fasting Schedule Definitely include short-term fasting (1-28 days) into your schedule. Your body will begin to literally "grow younger" before your eyes, especially, after day 10. Discipline and Determination Suppressing hunger (During days 1-5), one of life's greatest drives, is not easy for most! Eliminating food (During the fasting period), one of life's greatest pleasures, is not easy for most! However, those that have the discipline, and determination, wil have tremendous to extreme healthy benefits awaiting them! No Pain No Gain With the exceptions of days 1-5, particulary day 3, fasting is not nearly as difficult as one might imagine (In fact, after day 10, quite pleasurable). Remember too, exercise (Discussed next), also associated with some degree of self sacrifice to promote health, pales in comparison to fasting in terms of health benefits. In fact, one could perform 1-3 annual (14-28) fasts, or calorie restrict (10-30%), never exercise again, and achieve a state of health that no form or amount of exercise could ever accomplish. The good and bad on fasting: it focuses the body on burning up and clearing toxins. Its great for loosing weight!!! Breaks down cancer cells and other illnesses Also breaks down....built up chemicals, BODY FAT, and transformed fatty acids. you have to drink 8-10 glasses og water a day you have to stay exercise as your body gets weak You will suffer from dizziness, especially when getting up from sitting or laying down, May cause black outs if you go for a long fast Juice fast can cause extreme bowl movement. Take a multi-vitimin as the body may lack in this area. ***WATER FASTING*** This will mainly benefit people with a low metabloism, as it gathers lots of energy and then will find it easier compared to lower metabloism who will lose energy and probaly feel drowned out. Water dieting is one long detoxication, the long detox. Water fasting demands mental preperation, clear your calendar for the amount of days your planning to fast for. Water fasting is proven to be more difficult then juice fasting as the body is getting no calories or nutrients. ***JUICE FASTING*** There are alot of nutrients in fresh juice that energizes the body's natural regenerative abilities. This system of removing wasteand supply a full spectrum of nutrients has an advantage of over weight loss program Drinking less juice supples fewer calories therefore increasing detoxication. Juice diet drinks include: fresh juice, herbal tea, vegetable broth, and Barley green/water. ~~FASTING~~ Water. We absolutely must drink water to survive, and it has zero calories, so there's no excuse to not drink it. As we typically get much of our water content from foods, when we reduce food intake we begin to dehydrate ourselves, which is dangerous. Also, cold water chills the body and may raise metabolism to get warm again. Vitamins and minerals. We must have these, too, to survive and so againg there's no reason not to take atleast a daily multivitamin (which may help reduce some cravings aswell). Vitamins are vital in keeping our bodies functioning and our skin, hair, teeth nice. Particularly be aware of electrolytes(potassium, magnesium, salt, along w/ water balance) and calcium. Protein. Protein is necessary, particularly if youre exercising. It maintains and repairs our muscles, including heart muscle, which is (last i heard) kind of a requisite for continued survival. Caffeine. While caffeine can be an appetite supressant and can increase your metabolism, it will also act as a diuretic. Drink a glass of water for each cup of tea, coffee, or diet soda you have. Again, dehydration is a potentially serious problem. Get plenty of sleep. Steal naps whenever you can and rest when you need to rest. Sleep deprivation increases appetit and makes you age faster.